Texas


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     Common Misconceptions about Texas

* That everything is twice as big in Texas. - Really
everything is 1.865 times bigger, but we round up. 

* That the women have big hair. - In fact this was outlawed
in July 1977.  There is a task force and they are doing their 
best to reach every last woman.  Bear with us. 

* That Texas gets extremely hot in the summer. - Actually
we only have 2-3 days of real heat in Texas ... real heat being 
when there is over a 75% probability of self-combustion. 

* That JR Ewing still lives here. - That was a tv show people! 
Come on!  Chuck Norris, on the other hand, is a real, 
karate-choppin' Texas Ranger. 

* That we have killer bees, fire ants, gigantic roaches and
mosquitoes and other awful insects, tornadoes, hurricanes, and
damaging hailstorms. - I don't know where this pack of hysteria 
got started, but we're gonna assume it's from some non-Texan type. 
We tend to think of them as a few bitty bugs and a bad hair day. 

* That everyone speaks with a Texas accent. - Y'all just
don't know what y'all are talking about.

-----------------------------------

(BTW, what is the plural of y'all?


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